


I Used to Rule the World

by Batagur



Category: Stargate SG-1
Genre: Dreams, Episode Related, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2008-10-14
Updated: 2008-10-14
Packaged: 2017-10-10 14:16:56
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,551
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/100666
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Batagur/pseuds/Batagur
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>What really woke Daniel from Shifu's dream, and what all did it really teach him.</p>
            </blockquote>





	I Used to Rule the World

**Author's Note:**

> Based on Vid by wyomingnot. Many thanks to wyomingnot for permission and the inspiration.

"You never were that bright," Jack is staring at me, bewildered. He never could believe that I would be so careful. He remembers me as this trusting, naive creature. He's a blind, stupid fool. It must have been Sam who made him doubt. Bitch. I'd waited too long for Jack to come back to the fold. He couldn't stay angry forever, especially when he really couldn't prove that Teal'c's death was my fault.

"No," he replies softly.

The targeting computers are moving the satellites into synchronous orbit with their target. Jack is rambling on emphatically that Shifu maybe a Goa'uld trick. I know what he is thinking. He's wrong. I sold my soul far long ago. It's too late now to rethink.

"They used Shifu to put a bunch of stuff in my head in order to get me to build a weapon so I would eventually turn them on earth?"

"It's possible," Jack argues.

"There is only one flaw in that theory," I suggest. Jack watches me carefully. I'm not sure what he sees, but what ever it is, it is causing him pain.

"You're assuming that this is not what I wanted all along. "

"Don't… Don't…"

He doesn't understand. It will be for the best. He will see. The world needs single leadership. It needs one voice to rise above the stupidity and chaos. It will be nova Pax Roma. History has shown us again and again how the strength of single leadership brings stability through quick, definitive resolve. No more of this piecemeal mob rule and governance by committee. A united planet under one voice, one direction that will take us into a future without need or poverty. It is almost like a necessary evil. Just this one city and all other nations will fall in line. There need not be any more killing.

Upon my sole command, the targeting computer sends up the code to fire.

"Target has been eliminated," my technician David Yune confirms.

Jack looks at me. He doesn't understand now, but he will. He'll see. When he is my top military aid and closest advisor, he'll understand. He'll stay here with me, of course. I need to keep a careful eye on him until I can wear down Sam's influence. She's insane, he'll figure it out eventually. I have the whole north wing of the house ready just for him. He'll love living here. Yes, I know it.

He is just staring at me. Nothing to say, Jack? You just watched me take control of the world and you have nothing to say? Where is with the 'at a boy, Danny. You just nixed 10 million plus people. The most populous city in Europe and you just blew it off the map! I smile into the face of his disbelief and confusion. Those 10 million are nothing compared to the billions I have saved and will save. If I had let this thing go, and it had escalated, think of how many more would have died? And if the Goa'uld do come, we are ready.

Jack looks down and away from me for a moment, just staring at his hand that still holds the beretta. Don't be so obtuse, Jack. Stop being so maudlin. It doesn't suit you. It's time to celebrate. World peace at last!

He hefts the gun again. He knows that it is useless. Just put it down, Jack. I have a banquet planned for tonight. You can be my special guest. Food, wine, super models, all for us! He shifts on his feet. He looks pale. That's just the shock of it all. He'll get over that. It'll be easy from here. I'll get him everything he needs. Money, power, sex, whatever he desires, I can bring it to his doorstep. It's so little to ask in return for peace and security, isn't it?

He's staring at the gun so intently, lifting to look at it better. No, not to look? No.

Jack?

He's put the muzzle in his mouth.

JACK!  
****  
****  
****  
Now you see. The true measure is in denying the fight.

I awoke, choking on my own bile; the vision of Jack's brains painting a large control room monitor still vivid in my memory. My people had stood shocked. I had ordered the body taken from the room, trying my damnedest to keep my voice as cool and unconcerned as possible. I had been afraid to show weakness even then, even with my best friend dead at my feet and the direct line to the President of the United States flashing like there was no tomorrow. Deep inside me something had tore open, and I had saw all the reasons why. At that moment I had known, this was where I spent my life utterly alone in the gilded cage called power.

The grief of the vision ripped a hole in my soul. It was like losing Sha're all over again. God no! He would have killed me. He should have killed me. He would have killed himself once I was dead, but he failed the one task and succeeded in the other.

God, the grief. But I'm awake now. I think I'm at SGC. Was it really all a dream. I dreamed an entire year of my life? Maybe this is a dream. Yes, that sounds more like it. Jack killed himself. I blacked out from shock maybe? Now I'm dreaming like everything is back to how it was. I'm at SGC and Jack is probably still alive. It was so stupid.

It was so easy. I really believed it… until Jack ate his own gun.

My vision is clearing. For a moment my vision was swimming in tears. I blink to clear them and see Janet Frasier standing over me, that calm, capable look that was her trademark. Her lips slip into a tiny smile and I almost laugh out loud.

"Welcome back."

It was a dream. Thank god.  
~*~  
Jack is in my office. He walked me back here after Shifu left. I needed to sit down. I needed some quiet to think. I think Jack understands. I hope he understands.

"Coffee?" He stands at the doorway of my office as I sit down. His hands in his pockets he watches me with that classic I'm Jack and I never worry look. He's worried.

"You don't have to," I answer. I can't seem to keep eye contact.

"I want to," he replies softly, and I have to look at him again.

I was foolish in that dream, believing he wasn't smart enough to follow me, to understand how I think. I believe that Shifu's vision cured that little fallacy. What I didn't understand was just how much Jack believed in the basic goodness in me. He placed me on this pedestal of virtue. I'm so very human, Jack. It would take less to push me over the edge than you know.

Amazing as it may sound, Jack was the true "pure soul" in the dream. He'd done his fair share of evil but has come back to the default of good intentions every time. He is realistic about what he is capable of. He would never let it go that far… or would he? Can any of us be so sure. I found a monster lurking in my soul.

It was a monster Jack had been willing to take on. It was a monster that could have made Jack one of the most powerful men in the world. But Jack had chosen death. Jack had denied the fight.

Oh God, the vision of Jack putting his gun in his mouth comes back to me in sharp detail and I close my eyes.

"Daniel?"

"I used to rule the world," I whispered.

"Daniel?"

"I'm sorry, Jack. I… I don't need anything. I just need to be alone."

"You spend too much time alone, Daniel."

I feel a small snort of laughter come up out of me, taking me by surprised. "You may be right." I look up into Jack's eyes again. There is so much concern there; it makes me feel a gripping need, deep in the very heart of me. Strange, this feeling. I mean, I know he cares about me, but the feeling is so deep. He's always been there for me. He'll always be here for me. He tried to be there for me even in my dream. He was there for me until I showed him that I wasn't there any more.

"I'll be back with some coffee," he says. I nod and he leaves, softly closing the door.

He cares about me. I love him, and I would have perverted that love into a gilded cage for two. I would have given him anything he wanted just to have him by my side.

Jack returned with coffee. I think have everything I need. Do I really need to rule the world? Could I do it and keep him by my side? I know the answer to that already. Deny the fight.

(Be my mirror my sword and shield  
my missionaries in a foreign field

For some reason I can not explain  
once you go there was never, never an honest word  
And that was when I ruled the world

-Coldplay Viva La Vida)


End file.
